I have an existential crisis, i know that this life is supposed to be a test but i dont remember signing up for it and the fact that i didn't choose it yet i have to endure everything that it throws at me make me feeling trapped watching life happen to me and crushing me in the process, i have a strong faith which why i have this contradictions inside me, im grateful but i dont wanna be here, life is overrated and yet i don't have a say in the matter, this implifies during my birthday and i cannot imagine that I got to live to witness another one, its a cruel reminder that what i want doesnt matter in the equation and im supposed to just take it, i don't know what to expect from publicing this but if you have any advice or if you are going through the same thing let me know so i know im not the only one, not many can relate but am i supposed to just keep going anyway or...