tired

Hi guys I'm so tired. Tomorrow is my birthday so my parents and uncles wanted go to trip today I'm not sleeping I need to wake up at 6am now is 1am so we will go to the soooo boring place at my BD. I kinda hate my BD cause they're was a depression day I always argue with my parents and others adults. I hate adults ( not my parents) they always thinks they're right just because they older in my country adults never listen kids cause they're too young but why did they can't understand that we are humans too. When I say I don't wanna invite the peoples 30+ in BD they said u are ungrateful kid. My birthday was never celebrated the way I wanted. and this year I wanted to celebrate it the way I wanted so this day we going to the trip that 2 days long sorry guys I just tired of this thank u everyone (sorry for a bad English)

So, I'm bad in expressing my feelings, I don't know what's happening to me, I'm tired of this life, I'm tired of love, he was the best person and I loved him so much, I thought he's the only one who understands me but, he's changing, he doesn't care about me. I need someone to care about me, I told him about my illness but he uses it as a, something funny. I'm not okay, at all, I need help, but I can't ask for it, because nobody cares about me! They just see me as a funny girl, but, no one's trying to understand me Even when I talk about how do I feel, I just see people changing, hating me If someone has some advice or just, sweet things to tell me, I really need it

I'm feelin lost I can't speak to people I don't know how to speak I'm always alone even whne I'm in home I can't speak to my family I don't have the confidence to speak or do anythink I'm tierd My mind doesn't want to let me live

I'm feeling exhausted, I feel like it's useless, whatever I do never takes me to the wanted result, doka 3lbali one must be patient and believe in god and some things are not meant to be , but honestly when is it going to be my turn to be happy...I'm tired

I’m really tired of feeling like I always have to hold everything together Like no matter what happens, I just deal with it and move on like it’s normal But it’s not normal And I’m not okay as much as I pretend to be There’s too much going on at once, and I don’t even have the space to process any of it I just keep pushing through because I don’t have another option I don’t want to be strong all the time I don’t want to keep acting like nothing affects me I just want things to feel calm I just want to feel safe for a little while without expecting something to go wrong right after I don’t have everything figured out, and honestly, I’m really overwhelmed…

I'm going through a period of time where I just can't focus on anything on top of that I keep distracting myself the moment I try to get back on track of do what I have to doand I always feel tired and I'm sure that I am so depressed idk what to do I feel stressed all the time and under pressure and the fact that I keep comparing myself to others it's just exhausting i always try to get better but even anxiety gets me always and my very toxic environment is not helping if anyone is going through this I need a piece of advice or a solution or how to live with this idk

Tbh I still don't understand why I'm feeling this way is it the way I was since I was a kid or suddenly got depressed and now I can't even study as I used to I literally changed I can't even stay 2 hours studying I'm always on my bed and my phone and I feel tired and negative even though I always try to get better with any kind of way I tried praying cleaning my space thinking positivity but I always fail and I always seek attention from others and most of times now I'm alone I have friends but not really my friends everyone is busy with their lives even though we're just 18 I am so tired and my mental health is getting worse and I have I should study or else I will fail like last year