1d agofeeling Lost
yesterday i attempted suicide (i did so many times before when i was 8-11 ts was the 1st time in like 3 years) and i didnt feel anything, no guilt becs its haram or guilt becs i didnt tell my bff good bye, nothing at all it was just so peacful i just said the shahada and closed my eyes and just before i passed out mom came in and called me out for food and i got better, i feel so weird idk what to do, i told my bff and she was overwhelmed and needed some space now i feel completely alone and stressed idk what to do, my parents rejected therapy mainly becs they both physically and mentally abused me and mom sexually rortured me since i was 2½ and they stopped when i was 12 or 13 i just dont know what to do
The only solution i can think of is when u get to uni get a dorm room stay there if u can work do it use that money to go to therapy ur parents won't know
I am so sorry u had to go through this. U r not alone i have had suicidal thoughts for 5 years now i was so close too but i backed down cuz i got scared. Ik this is so hard for u i can't even imagine it am sorry but ik it will pass. I assume u r young so study as much as u can to get out of that household and go by urself to therapy